you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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