is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Randomize
