he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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