Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
