you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
