remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
