puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
