Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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