Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
It's Friday. Sex?
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
i out mim tonsoeep
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