butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Randomize
