just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
