Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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