I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
