Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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