the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
