The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Just cropdusted the office
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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