sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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