I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
