he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
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