I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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