No awkward lesbian experiences without me
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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