The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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