so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
