bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
my shit smells like andre
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
