Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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