Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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