Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
