Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
