and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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