there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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