she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
