Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
