Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
