So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize