I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
