I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
