Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
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