take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
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