So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
