How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
