It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
