i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
My penis needs a shock collar
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
