I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
