return my video game
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
