She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
