it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
