i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
