This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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