He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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