How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
